For Nines - DS's back yard / herb garden ... NOT related to post :)

REVOLVING DOORS IN THE LAND OF BARBARIANS

A friend of ours coined the phrase ‘medical revolving doors,’ noting that once primary doctor’s care considered a condition, it’s doors revolved – between all known cohorts – until everyone got a stab at you. The friend called it sharing the bounty … tongue in cheek, maybe sharing more fee than wisdom.

I have my toe in that revolving door again. Yesterday, my D-twin-S wrote about my visit to the hospital for tests, “Sorry you had to be in the land of barbarians.” DS is an RN (the best I’ve ever seen) and knows whereof she humorously speaks truth. This time the doors revolved in a comedy of confusion, too.

The doctor, who was seeing drop-ins in family physician’s stead, told me I could just ‘drop in’ the imaging center anytime for kidney/bladder x-rays. When I called to be sure (Rule # 1: Never trust a doctor under 30, no matter how pleasant) I was told in answer to my questions about the procedure that (1) the dye is the same as is used in cardiac cath’s; (2) test must be pre-scheduled; (3) patient’s with dye allergy must have the procedure done at a hospital instead of imaging center; and (4) there is a 24-hour prep for the test. I was given the phone number for scheduling at the hospital and that call led to further discoveries: the ordering Dr. would have to supply Rx for pre-dosage steroids, a 24-hour (colonoscopy type – ugh) prep-kit as well as an order for bloodwork 48+hrs post test. More phone calls and another trip to pharmacy so that I myself could do the prep, take the pills (prednisone and benedryl), stop the pills (diabetes drugs) and have the bloodwork a few days after the test to see if my kidneys can tolerate resuming the diabetes meds. And of course pay the bills. . . which always goes unmentioned.

As sometimes happens, the prep was worse than the test. Sorry guys, but colon cleansing is barbaric! The steroids make me wired - I slept maybe 2 hours before night between that and tummy rumbles. But, the Benedryl helped me rest some during the test - which ran a 2-hour course, trying to lie still on a cold steel table. I noted that the equipment might have been around when DS David had his first kidney x-rays in 1969. On the bright side, the dye-needle went in with one poke instead of the usual 3-4 and only a moderate amount of subsurface probing; and that probing nurse brought blankets – heated ones!.

A few hours after returning home from my exciting adventure, my flesh started crawling. Yep, a look in the mirror found swollen eyes, red neck and drew the obvious conclusion that the pre-dose steroid needed a boost. More phone calls and another trip to pharmacy took another five hours. Let's just call this little dance the Barbarian Shuffle. By this time I’m saying, BEAM ME UP SCOTTY, I want Bones’ hand held scanner and 30-second diagnosis!!!

Lame humor aside, the results were good…no major problems, just a few more revolving doors.

Further, for those of you who are/know good health care providers, I truly do appreciate modern medical science and am grateful to have had first hand experience with life-saving intervention. I thank God for those who with insight, dedication and compassion serve needing patients…for such care makes the rest of the land of barbarians bearable.